MRS. DEAN

I saw this at my friend Illara’s journal and thought I should do something similar since I tend to love a lot of things in one single year, so here’s a list of things that won my heart on 2009. I shall warn you it’s going to be a LONG list hehe!.

1.- DEAD BY SUNRISE
Obviously, the best about 2009 was Chester’s band Dead By Sunrise. Like I’ve said before, whatever Chester Bennington is in, I’m going to support it and I simply fell for this new band, the music is AMAZING. And I was extremely happy that I finally heard something totally CHESTER. His lyrics, his music, his voice, this was a true work of Chester Bennington, so it’s very special for me!.

2.- RYAN SHUCK
I was never really into Orgy and I never paid that much attention to Julien-K and at first, I thought I wouldn’t like Dead By Sunrise’s other members, ’cause I only cared about Chester, I seriously thought it would be hard for me to like other guys that weren’t Linkin Park. BUT it only took me one interview to love Ryan, he’s so funny and I simply liked him. Plus, I love the interaction in interviews with him and Chester, you can easily see they’re true friends just having fun and that’s amazing.

3.- MIKE SHINODA’S PICTURE
What can I say? I’m loving his style and this picture is simply PERFECT and I fell for it, I can spend minutes staring at it.

4.- TALINDA BENNINGTON
I know she’s not a real celeb. And I don’t normally follow Chester Bennington’s personal life, ’cause after all it should be PERSONAL. But I got a chance to know this lady a little bit more than only from pictures and she’s amazing. I never thought she’d be as nice as she actually is, and I really really liked her.

5.- HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU (Alex & Gigi)
This movie rocks, I loved it. I totally fell for Alex and Gigi’s relationship since the beginning. How Alex was always true to her even though he seemed to be cruel. I watched it again last night, and I could watch it over and over again. Simply PERFECT!. And it was always good to learn that when a guy wants to see a girl, he’ll make it possible.

6.- TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON
I never thought I would like this movie as much as I did. There was one time in my life that I had a love triangle that I usually compare with these three fictional characters. My personal brand of heroin that I could never resist, and the guy that offered me everything a girl would want and was healthier for me but I always rejected. And this movie reminded me of that time. Specially the line that goes something like “Don’t make me choose, it’s always been him” or something like that.

7.- TAYLOR LAUTNER
If you wonder why I put Taylor and not my RPattz on the list, it’s because I fell for Robert in 2005, not in 2009 heh!. Anyway, I never liked Taylor, never ever… until I saw New Moon. Then I read he was 17 and now I feel like a sinner for lusting after a CHILD haha. I’m still Team Edward though hehe.

8.- ENRIQUE BUNBURY’S CONCERT
It was AMAZING the best concert I’ve ever been in. Even though I had a heartbreaking moment when it was canceled in my city, I got to travel and still see him live and it was totally worth it. He’s an amazing performer and I got to sing my favorite songs along with the man itself. An experience I’ll NEVER forget.

9.- ENRIQUE BUNBURY’S AUTOGRAPH
I’ve never had an autograph in my entire life that I trully treasured. The only three pretty cool autographs I got are Alex Lora’s (from a band called El Tri), Ty Dennis’ (from Riders on The Storm formely The Doors) and this one, but this is the coolest one ’cause I adore Enrique Bunbury and is one of my top favorite artists from all time.

10.- AMERICA VS. ATLANTE MATCH
My favorite soccer team has been America since I was a little kid. I had never seen a match live, I did for the first time this year and it was AMAZING being there in the crowd, shouting things to my team. Specially ’cause I have a crush on one of their players called Memo Ochoa haha!.

11.- CHESTER’S TWEET
Even though he got my twitter name wrong, I really appreciated that he thanked me. It was trully, one of the best days of my life haha I was so incredibly happy I couldn’t believe he knew a ChesterDEAN existed somewhere and it was really really sweet. He made me smile like prolly no one has ever done it.

12.- CHESTERDEAN.NET
Even though the site isn’t that great and sometimes it lacks of interesting content, making it was GREAT and I’ve got to know amazing people and it’s always nice to have a place to go and rant about my favorite things and read about the things my friends likes. So, making this site is part of the things I loved this year.

13.- BIGGER
I don’t have the actual album yet (This is Us) of the Backstreet Boys but I have it on my computer. And I’m simple addicted to the song Bigger. The lyrics reminds me how I could have loved a jekr and still stood by his side because I was in love… like he could dedicate this song to me and fit our relationship haha. Plus, Brian looks freaking adorable in the video and AJ is wearing a Jim Morrison tee. Even though I’d have loved if the video had something to do with the lyrics, that’d had been awesome.

14.- CHESTER’S PLAID SHIRTS
I’m loving that Chester’s wearing plaid shirts again. It brings back the nostalgia when plaid shirts were his favorites around 2001 and I was a brand new fan. It reminds me of the good old times when I was young and found the band that I’d love forever.

15.- FIRE
And finally… the song Fire by Dead By Sunrise. I’ve already made a post about this song and how special it is to me. Back in 2005-ish that I was going through the worst time of my life, Chester Bennington gave me “Let Down” and now, that time changed me, he now gave me “Fire”. And it kind of expresses a lot of things I feel and think. So this year, THIS is MY song and I’m gonna always be grateful with Chester Bennington for always making a special song that would help me cope with my personal demons.

Nov

20

Meaningful Songs

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Everybody can feel related to a song, it’s a natural thing and it’s mostly why people likes music so much. I tend to find meanings in songs and feel related to them and they’re like my little source of comfort when I feel no one understands me, or if I can’t express myself in the right way, there’s always a song I can go to and express myself with it.

I feel related to a LOT of John Lennon’s songs. Mostly, the deep ones like “I Know, I Know” or “Working Class Hero” (not really the ones about his obsessive love for Yoko). “Crippled Inside” is a song I adore and feel related to it from the beginning to the end, but they’re not ALL of his songs, nor the majority. I can relate to a lot of Paul McCartney’s song but then again, they’re not even close to being the majority. But I still like all of theirs songs because of the music, the rhythm, the lyrics, etc, even though they’re not that meaningful to ME.

The same with Linkin Park or Dead By Sunrise, I’m related to a lot of their songs but not ALL of them, even though I adore them all and listen to them all.

But with Enrique Bunbury is quite diffferent, of all the songs I’ve already listened to, it’s like the 90% has a special meaning to me and I feel related to them and when I listen to them I remember a certain someone, or a moment or a place, or something special. The one of the video is my latest obsession, it’s a song a boy sings to a girl “Bellisima” means “Beautiful” but more than that, like “Really Beautiful” and he’s telling her don’t do it because of me because I don’t deserve so much, I’m an ass and you’re beautiful, I’m not right for you and everyone knows but I can’t stop and I take whatever you give me. And when I listen to it I have to think in a certain someone that always told me he wasn’t right for me but he just couldn’t step away haha see? every freaking song means something to me and it’s freaking me out.

I haven’t listened to them all since he has a LOT but I’ve already listened to a lot of them, and every time I find a song I get all stupid because of the lyrics, plus his voice is amazing. So for me, it’s kind of scary to listen to an unknown song because I’m afraid is going to open an old wound hehe I don’t know what to expect from his music anymore. But I love it!.

Nov

5

Let Down

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This song means the world to me, when I found the acoustic version of this song and listened to it for the first time, I cried my eyes out, it was a long long time ago and I was going through the shittiest moment of my life. I used to listen to it over and over again, had it in repeat on my iPod, going through long bus trips from my house to a friend’s house listening to this song and truly feeling every line of the song “I don’t want to be let down” “Love was not enough when you want everything” “I don’t want to live my life again”. I don’t know if it made me feel better or it just depressed me more, but I simply loved it and it was “my song”.

It has happened twice with a song sang by Chester, the first one was My December, it was “my” song. Then the years passed and new events happened and Let Down became my song, and then again years passed and events happened and Fire became my new song. But Let Down is gonna always be special to me. It reminds me of that time, and now I don’t get depressed, just a little bit nostalgic. But jee, this is such an amazing song. And the video is simply beautiful.

Sep

1

Fire

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I can’t thank Chester Bennington enough for all he’s done for me without even knowing. Back in 2005 when my heart was broken into million pieces by love for the first time he wrote Let Down, that song helped me a lot, at least it was a nice way to express what I was feeling with someone else’s words. When I felt my world going down the drain I remember sobbing to “I don’t want to be let down I don’t want to live my life again don’t want to be led down the same old road” and wanna know something? I did… I’m going through something completely different but it feels the exact same way…. like HELL!.

And what did Chester Bennington do this time? FIRE.

No need to hear your voice or see your face
To know that you are with me
No need to kiss your lips or hold your hand
To know that you can feel me
I know that you can feel me

When I look to the stars
I know just where you are
You’re looking down upon me

No need to get locked up inside the past
I know it isn’t changing
No need to say goodbye or let you go
I know that you’ll be waiting
I know that you’ll be waiting

When I look to the stars
I know just where you are
You’re looking down upon me

On the other side
On the other side

I’ve got to find the way
To keep my pain from burning
Down to the bone

I’ve got to find the way
To keep my pain from burning
Down to the bone, down to the fire

When I look to the stars
I know just where you are
You’re looking down upon me

And I seriously needed this song. I just can’t stop listening to it and the saddest thing is that it doesn’t really remind me of my actual situation but the old one (just been in love once, I always go back to that memory when I’m hurt) and GOD Chester’s voice is going to kill me, he sounds…. beautiful.

Jul

1

Anything That’s Part Of You

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I memorize the note you sent
Go all the places that we went
I seem to search the whole day through
For anything that’s part of you

I kept a ribbon from your hair
A breath of perfume lingers there
It helps to cheer me when I’m blue
Anything that’s part of you

Oh, how it hurts to miss you so
When I know you don’t love me anymore
To go on needing you
Knowing you don’t need me

No reason left for me to live
What can I take, what can I give
When I’d give all of someone new
For anything that’s part of you

So I just realised I have this Elvis song on my computer (I have like 23 of his records on my computer, I don’t think I’ve heard them all) And… awwww, the lyrics just broke my heart and his voice always gets me. It sucks to be a sentimental silly girl sometimes.